What Are We Talking About Here, Sunshine? Lunch?

Me:                    Mom, I’m going out for lunch with some friends. I’ll be back.

Sunshine:        Oh, you’re going out, huh?

Me:                    Uhhhh… yeah. Some girlfriends are taking me out…

Sunshine:        Now listen, you haven’t taken me out to lunch one time… (She’s yelling, and spitting at me through clenched teeth.)

Me:                     Mom, I only just had surgery a few weeks ago. My girlfriends are taking me out to celebrate my recovery. Do you want to come with us?

Sunshine:         No. I do not want to go.

Me:                     Uh, okay, soooo… see you later then.

Sunshine:        You never want to take me to lunch!!! (She’s yelling again.)

Me:                    So do you want to go with us today?

Sunshine:        No.

Me:                    Do you want to go to lunch tomorrow?

Sunshine:        No.

Me:                    Sooooo… what are we talking about here?

Sunshine:        I don’t know.

Me:                    Me neither. Bye.

What on earth was my mother talking about? Somebody help me.

–Jennifer