Sunshine: You didn’t want me to have any chicken.
Me: Wha?
Sunshine: That’s why you started packing up the food. You didn’t want me to have any more chicken. And I was still hungry and I wanted more chicken.
Me: Uhhhh… if you want more chicken, just say ‘hey, let me get another piece of chicken before you put that away,’ and then you can just get another piece of chicken.
Sunshine: I can’t live somewhere that I can’t even get enough to eat! (She’s yelling.)
Me: Okay. I’m not going to have this conversation. If you want something to eat, then eat. No one has ever left this house hungry. That’s our thing. If you can’t just say ‘more chicken’ then I can’t help you.
Sunshine: You’re twisting my words.
Me: What are we talking about here? Chicken? Why is this even a conversation?
Sunshine: You’re trying to make me starve or something!!! (She’s yelling again.)
Me: I’m not having this conversation.
Sunshine: That’s because you don’t care if I live or die.
Me: Mom, please stop. Eat whatever you like.
Sunshine: Just not when you serve chicken.
Me: I give up.
What on earth was my mother talking about? Somebody help me.
–Jennifer